The Snow Moon

Today is Loveuary 24, 2024

Writing sets me free...

I bring attention to words, spells... not aesthetics.

Aesthetics = the study of beauty

When you come to my house, we go behind closed doors it's loud... a little messy... maybe even dusty... but it's full of love and laughter... and to me, nothing is more beautiful than love accompanied with laughter.

I hear Isaac Carree saying clean this house.

Today is 02/25/2024 because I am all over the place

there is no order I start writing I stop writing I start back writing but not from the bottom

Tikisha didn't start from the bottom but likes the bottom

I strive for the top but something about being on top

it's not for me I can't go nonstop

so I stop drop to the middle for just a little

he shoots his pistol trickle

ding transmittal message you know this man is noncommittal

toxic block it use logic

but our energy is atomic exotic

you know this man is iconic

my narcotic girl you're almost fifty I repeat use logic

he's cosmic my antibiotic

our relationship may seem chaotic

it's my aquatic that keeps him hypnotic

it's symbolic when I say I'm addicted like an alcoholic

The bible uses a lot of symbolism. I grab my grandmother's bible. Are you new here? If not, I know you know her bible is the bible I primarily read but it's important to me to say that every time I feel like it - I am here because of her.

I grab my crystals.

I walk in my son's room. He's not home.

It's important for me to pray with you, my loved ones.

It's important for me to pray for you, my loved ones.

It's important for me to cleanse, pray and ask God to bless your space, our home.

Psalm 124 which is I think 125 in more recent bibles

They who trust in the Lord are like Mount Sion, which is immovable; which forever stands.

125 (126)

When the Lord brought back the captives of Sion, we were like men dreaming. The footnote describes dreaming as "almost" too good to be believed.

The word almost is significant to me... Dreams are real.

I was scheduled to work today at the "on call" mortgage job. Let me be clear I scheduled myself to work today for 4 hours because I hate my supervisor and we have to be available for 10 hours/week... even though work may or may not be available. Yup, I said hate. I feel like I am being micromanaged by her - let me do my job... how I am doing is not relevant to my job function because whatever I have going on in my personal life ceases while I am at work, working. I get the whole small talk, being personable bullshit... however, this ain't that. I flashback to her asking me about my mom... ma'am I told you before she's deceased... I flashback to her asking me about holidays... ma'am I told you I don't celebrate holidays. The flashbacks continue.

I woke up feeling a bit under the weather, stuffy nose & sore throat. I am not end of the world ill but I am I don't feel like working for "the man" ill.

I read a Facebook post yesterday... I don't get how people afford life without a job? I can't even afford it with a job.

I am sure it's time I trust God.

I do a lot of things... including running small businesses. I am okay with the word "small". It's mine rather small or big + gotta start somewhere - this bottom isn't the bottom I previously mentioned. I don't feel like I have a job.... until the "mortgage job" comes into play... I think about how I thought I would retire from there... how I loved it... truth is, I don't want that job. I don't hate it. I hate the lifestyle.

I loved the income... income means coming in.

The income.

Coming in.

Gain is my birthright.

Growing up I was told "if you don't work you don't eat"

2 Thessalonians 3:6-15 Against Idleness

don't avoid work, set an example by being an example, provide for yourself, don't be a burden, mind your own business, don't meddle, don't get tired of doing the right thing, be mindful of who you associate with while they might not be labeled as an enemy they are not a brother

Paul was speaking again idleness... laziness...

I am a bunch of things but lazy is not one. I could work all day, I have... I said I've worked 70+ hours in one week... there is no time when I'm doing what I love.

I guess what I love has changed... it is no longer cars, handbags, jewelry.

It's The Most High God, it's Tikisha, it's my lord, it's my son, it's family, it's my ancestors, it's friends, it's nature, it's experiences - it's life. I love life. I love living.

Freedom.

I want freedom.

I am not limited to a bi-weekly check. I am not limited to a capped rate of pay.

I am not measured by someone else's standards... well I am, the proper statement is

I don't live up to anybody else's standards.

I am limitless.

I have everything I need in this moment in time. I too will take this moment for life...

I hear vita e tempo.

I absolutely love my life.

I get afraid at times, not knowing where or when my next dollar will come from but the fear only last a split second. I focus on the now. The right now... love, family, food, shelter. I have everything I need. Gratefulness.

Psalm 126 (127)

I read this a few times.

It's nothing that happens that God does not want to happen.

Rise or Rest? ...for he gives to his beloved in sleep = Our Lord taught the same truth, that God's blessings come to those who do not worry but trust in His loving providence

.......when I pray over my son I remember verse 3 behold, sons are a gift from the Lord; the fruit of the womb is a reward

Evaluate the problem.

Have a vision.

Ask for advice. Accept help.

................ this is the part they leave out, the work, the steps, an incomplete testimony

The public journal. The work. The steps. The fears.

I think about moving in silence. If we all moved in silence how would anybody ever learn? I talk to those I trust - maybe the problem is I'm trusting the wrong people or maybe I'm talking too soon. Snake.

My niece said there are a lot of stars but she was the sun

Me, I'm the moon... I bring the light to the dark and there are so many phases to me

Tikisha, a self-proclaimed moon goddess says "believe it to see it"

I love how I go from first person to third person to talking directly to the reader... hey you

What person is it called when you are talking directly to someone? I told you all I don't know much about grammar, I don't have a vast vocabulary, I say like and just a lot especially like

I have a lot of thoughts... things to say... documenting for myself and my family - one day my journaling will be a part of my legacy.

What is your legacy?

What Drake say - I'm just all about my goals

I'm on one

I'm the only one his only one

The word believe means to consider to be true or honest to accept the word or evidence of... here I go with my 80 dictionaries

believe - to have religious faith... the example "to believe in a life after death"

Do you believe in life after death?

This is literally how my mind goes - I interrupt people with no intentions of being rude it's because I'm constantly thinking my brain interrupts my brain so I'll double back to life after death eventually.... wait, was that a Biggie song or album?

Remember we used to say tape (cassette), CD, album... what do they say now? stream?

SEE my brain

focus

believe - to have trust or confidence in, to suppose, guess

Damn believe means guess?

guess - to judge, or decide about something without having enough facts to know for certain

Ha! new key new mental level... guessing and believing are the same as having faith

believe - to accept as true or real, to have confidence in, trust, to expect or suppose; think - it says I believe that he will come shortly American Heritage Dictionary I believe the same damn thing

He will come shortly

the meaning of believe for the alpha's haven't changed much it still says to have faith or confidence in the existence or worth of it also states "to hold an opinion"

believe it to see it

so what is it? the it that we are believing

by definition it simply means the subject of a clause to refer to another clause that comes later

read that again

that comes later

again no grammar girl so what does clause mean?

clause is a group of words that includes a subject and a verb, but that forms only part of a sentence ... I am processing that as incomplete, one is incomplete without the other

both are required

BELIEVE IT TO SEE IT

...there is nothing too hard for God

God I feel incomplete. They say when you feel incomplete you are not healed. The word incomplete means without all its parts. It's okay for me to say I feel incomplete.

How can I be complete when I am missing parts of me?

Incomplete without my mama telling me my hair is nappy

Incomplete because my son doesn't have a good wife to make him a pappy

yet

Incomplete without my special someone I'm feeling sappy kinda crappy

Incomplete because I can't stop talking being flappy and yappy

flash

Incomplete without having a job working 40+ hours a week

Incomplete because my account is looking bleak

moment

Incomplete without being able to speak

Incomplete because these bitches think I'm weak

second

Incomplete without my own boutique

Incomplete because I thought I would be at my peak

instant

Mary Mary told me to go get it.

Go get it. I remember the word heal meant to get.

I just need to get it.

I listen to the go get it lyrics. I think of the note my mother wrote - if you always do what you always did you'll always get what you always got

The truth is I love my nappy hair

The truth is I know my son is not ready to be a husband yet

The truth is I still can't believe one day I woke up and knew who I'd marry flash

The truth is I never want to work 8 hours a day moment

The truth is I will not be quiet split second

Heal means to get... so I'm always healing because I'm always getting

the journey doesn't stop - this is something I say a lot on the Kolorflow Conversations YouTube podcast

I am always healing

I am not the same person in the morning that I am in the evening

based on what I got that day I may change, for the better or worse

I don't claim to be perfect

again love is easy forgiveness is hard

I think about how people think being spiritual is walking in love and light 24/7

I've lived my life as a spiritualist before I even knew how I was living had a title

I don't walk around saying I love everybody - I say I love people I don't even know

Love the action, not the reaction

I have a lot of love to give to those deserving of my love

I have a lot of hate in me as well... I will not allow everyone to be in my presence

My presence is a present, it's bigger than energy for me

I try to forgive and forget but for me I can't forgive and not forget

If I don't forget can I say I've truly forgiven you?

read that again, help me to make it make sense - help me to understand

If I am truly over something it doesn't exist anymore, I've forgotten about it but if I'm am constantly bringing it up or maybe not even constantly if I am bringing it up then something about that situation has bothered me and still is bothering me

The past is not real. I say this because I have forgotten the past so if I have no recollection of it can it be real? Is your memory my memory? Does your memory make it real? ...memories are real

living in the now

Isaiah 43:18 Forget the former things, do not dwell on the past

the present moment

tough... we live for the future then shun those like myself that guide you to the future

guide me future

help me to understand this

they call me a witch and I used to be okay with this... I think of Halloween and how I love all the decorations so ok I'll be a witch then I looked up the meaning

Witch - a woman who is imagined to have magic power with the help of the devil; an ugly and mean old woman; hag

I may have magick power but it's not with the help of the devil - but what is "the devil" ?

There are some that believe the deceased are evil, demonic spirits... so who are the angels reference in the Bible? Are you born an angel and die a demon? Please help me, make it make sense. Psalm 91...

I may not be beautiful but I am pretty, hence not ugly maybe even old and a bit mean but no hag

in the present moment

I try to be happy, a better word is positive but at times life puts me in situations where I feel helpless - I think this is why I am struggling with not being an employee and fully committing to what I want to do with my life ...as a wife, entrepreneur

Is this slave mentality? Do I "need" to feel like I have to have somebody telling me what to do

having a set schedule, asking for time off, waiting impatiently for payday

I remember on 02/16/2023 S. W. said to her team, myself included we look like "idiots" - oh really

girl maybe you looked like an idiot but I always look like a goddess, a child of The Most High God

I am sure we looked like humans... making mistakes, trying to meet quantity expectations

this memory is real and vivid

I swear it's a Netflix special waiting to happen

waiting impatiently for payday

having money saved but always wanting more money

working 70 hours in one week for more money

no time for family and friends

no time to enjoy my Benz

spending money on the latest trends

when I already know the mortgage industry transcends then descends

as I stop and stare

at myself in the mirror

things are finally getting clearer

I’m no longer bitter

my hair is not a trigger

I started my locs

remember Reeboks

their campaign was I am what I am

glam got d*mn

and if you don’t like it scram

you see the best thing I did

was get rid

of the self-hate

checkmate

BELIEVE IT TO SEE IT

What is the "it" that we are believing in? It, the subject, can be whatever you want it to be.

I believe in The Most High God. I believe in angels, spirits... I believe my ancestors are in the spiritual realm protecting me. I believe in deities, gods, and goddesses. I believe in signs and synchronicities, even when I'm unsure of the path I am on. I believe I am the co-creator of my life. I believe wholeheartedly in what's unseen.

I believe in magick.

I believe in love.

I believe in infinity.

I believe everything I need is within reach, whether I'm reaching for it myself or someone is handing it to me.

I believe moving in silence is a valuable lesson but I believe what God has for me is for me and the enemy can intervene, but the enemy cannot stop God.

Affirm: I BELIEVE TO SUCCEED.

I'm tired of the struggle... who taught me scarcity... I hear Toni's voice... who taught me bad had to follow good? Who taught me more money more problems? Who taught me problems not solutions?

I am just ready for overflow and I feel incomplete without it.

Yes, I am ready. I am ready for overflow.

I hear Tasha Cobbs Leonard singing louder and louder... Declare it over your finances I am ready for overflow. I'm getting ready to see something I've never seen. God is about to blow my mind - talk to em Tasha!

He tapped em and told em she's mine - Nicki talk yo shit!

but don't be a mean girl

your persona to the world

I am her she is me

girl's girl mentality

all while keeping my own individuality

I can support you with no harm to me

I have no jealousy

this too will be a part of my legacy

I just say what I know like Bill Bellamy

generations follow... follow, next, after

first

I believe today is the last fully moon of the astrological year.

Full Moon in Virgo

Pisces season... the last... but for me, a fellow Piscean it's the beginning.

It's time for me to let go once and for all.

This is the beginning.

Oracle card on 2/24 #27 New Beginnings

New and brighter beginning await me now.

Today, the Sabbath Day.

Today, the full moon in Virgo.

Today, rituals.

Why are there numbers on oracle cards? Numbers... significant... we can't live a day without numbers yet no belief in angel numbers?!?! I remember reading the book of Numbers looking for answers. I didn't find what I was looking for... I still don't get it, angel numbers, but I trust it... faith.

maybe men are dogs... this dog is loyal to its owner he always picks her first, as he should

but when she's not around he comes out to play

with me

when she's around he stays right by her side

men will play you right in your face & think you don't know

Tikisha a seer. I see everything clear.

Tikisha clairaudient. I can hear.

The signs may disappear but they always appear when things are severe.

My dear listen hear don't let me shed a tear because my ancestors will make you disappear.

I'm a pioneer but they volunteer.

Hunger Games but I won't name any names _____

cause I don't fuck with lames I just stand back and watch you all blow up in flames

your remains ignite my veins

this should explain why with no campaigns

I attain sustain maintain all domains

being high brings truth... many canvases, many layers... never violent, a snake is never violent until striking distance... look at your face

Mea Culpa, a Tyler Perry film

GUILT

Watch your face, your facial expressions before life teaches you new lessons

roses are red

violets are blue

and what I know to be true

is my love for you

future shooter

future cougar

intruder user be my ruler

super

trapper

HONEST 11:11 make a wish

I see it... the vision is clear. I keep getting richer and richer. Save Me. Monster.

Beloved, you're not a monster not even close... talk to me, your voice I just want to hear your voice in my ear and keep you near. I don't dare to be different. I am different.

Abnormal is normal. Imitated but never ever duplicated.

Signs & Synchronicities

222 - 318 - 1111 - 824 - Hear - Life After Death - Red Sea - Pepsi - Marry - Michigan - Chicago

Skyline - Walking - Black - Protection - Eyes - Hidden - Sunglasses - Soul - Lies - Loyalty

Deceit - Cheating - Freedom - Family - Scars - OA - Nurse - St. Louis - Copy Cat - Matriarch

Numerology - 6th Century - Palindrome - Rest - Reset - It doesn't exist, it's not real - Proposal

Grounding - Be Yourself - Be Brave - Ignite - Purple - Jellyfish - Mermaid - 101 - Oceanside - letter P, M, O - Fork in the road - Ruby - Forest - Owl - Seagull - Octopus - Clarence - Queen - Birthright

Ethereal - Family First - Prom - He loves me - He loves me not - He love me - The Last Dance

Praising You - Celebrations - Squid - Lillies - King - Holy Ghost - Pink - Porsche - Rolls Royce

Toca Boca the new playing with barbies

TikTok the new playing with friends

Psalm 44 (45)

Vs. 2 My heart overflows with a goodly theme; I sing my ode to the king, my tongue is nimble as the pen of a skillful scribe.

Vs. 11 Hear, O daughter, and see: turn your ear, forget your people and your father's house.

Vs. 12 So shall the king desire your beauty; for he is your lord, and you must worship him.

Vs. 13 ..... the rich among the people seek your favor = addressed to the bride but it should be understood as referring to the king

I love you my lord. One.

I want to give my husband a daughter, because I think it will be more special...

What is more special? I am enough.

Choose your own path. Choose Tikisha. The rest shall follow. Literally.

I live a life of ease and joy. I live a life of luxury and leisure.

Magician. High Priestess. Empress. Hermit. Maiden. Mother. Crone. ....a triple goddess

The waning moon is Sunday 03/03/2024.

#338 I am grateful for the present blessings the blessings that come and look forward to abundance coming my way.