American Dream or Fairytale

12/13/2024

The would is a scary place should we ever procreate or is that just the little of the world I see?

What’s beyond my eyes that is what I need to see…

with no manipulation antics

this is for us

us, who believe in fairytales

when they say I can do bad all by myself

for us

us, that know our strength standing alone

Princess and the Frog …misunderstood

Cinderella …maid

Snow White …hunted

Beauty and the Beast …sacrifice

Rapunzel …trapped

The Little Mermaid …voiceless

Sleeping Beauty …cursed

Rumpelstiltskin …bargained

The Princess and the Pea …unbelieved

Hansel and Gretel …abandoned

Red Riding Hood …deceived

I am not ashamed of my desire, my desire to be a wife …be a wife WAIT! not want a husband

Damn! I think I’m finally letting that sink in.

you’ll have to learn what a wife is

you’ll have to learn what a wife is to him

no, you’ll have to learn what a wife is

and you will learn that by allowing God to lead

the still small voice

I submit to the Lord

He directs my steps

I’m learning to obey

RESPECT

women respect men men respect women respect rewind begin again and again and again

I tell myself

I hope you are seen for the beauty that you are

the eyes your ex called headlights

high school being called Neck

the “jokes” about my teeth nearly destroyed me

from a boy who’s face was full of acne

Lord I released thee, the pain I held

I know God is directing my steps.

Proverbs 16:9

A man’s heart deviseth his way: but the Lord directeth his steps.

I flip to Proverbs 31 to remind myself of his wealth. They call us gold diggers, it’s a requirement of Proverbs 31.

Wait, from the top. I let the fear of the Lord guide my understanding, as Proverbs 1:7 says, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge: but fools despise wisdom and instruction,” and Proverbs 9:10 reminds me, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the holy is understanding.” This reverence keeps me grounded, allowing God to refine me into the woman He has called me to be.

Proverbs 3:5-6 is my anchor: “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths.” I listen to His voice through my spiritual connection, trusting Him to guide my every step. Right now and forevermore, I embrace Him as my first love, my foundation, and my source of direction. I know He is showing me how to walk with purpose and dignity, leading me into the fullness of the woman He desires me to be.

I guard my heart with all diligence, as Proverbs 4:23 teaches, because well life and its lessons. I understand that my preparation and transformation is for the honor of living as a woman who reflects God’s glory.

When I meditate on verses like Proverbs 31:10

“Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies” I ask God to reveal areas in me that need refining. I want to be that woman, not by my own efforts, but through His grace and wisdom.

This season is not about rushing or forcing outcomes. Instead, it is about reverence, obedience, and trust. I submit my desires to Him daily, knowing that He is preparing me in ways I cannot yet see. I know that as I fear the Lord and walk in His wisdom, He will direct my paths and fulfill the plans He has for me. Whether it is today or years from now, I trust Him completely to lead me where I am meant to be, knowing He is the ultimate guide of my steps.

Proverbs 31:23

Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.

This verse this one verse clearly indicates that her husband is a man of prominence and respect, likely wealthy or influential, as the city gates were places where leaders, judges, and elders conducted business and made decisions. His presence at the gates reflects his esteemed position in society, which aligns with the virtuous woman’s ability to manage her household and contribute to their prosperity.

I am walking in my purpose.

I am a woman of virtue, walking in wisdom, strength, and dignity.

I am clothed with grace and honor, and I face the future with confidence.

I am diligent in my work, ensuring my household is well cared for and prosperous.

I am a giver, extending my hands to the poor and opening my heart to those in need.

I am trustworthy, bringing goodness to all who rely on me.

I am wise in my words, speaking with kindness and guiding others with love.

I am walking in my purpose, creating a legacy of faith, strength, and abundance.

I am blessed, and my works speak for me at the gates.

Lord,

I see now that You have been preparing me in ways I didn’t fully understand at first. The challenges I’ve faced and the transitions I’ve experienced

from seasons of uncertainty to employment, stepping into the world of podcasting, and fully embracing my calling as a spiritualist.

have all been part of Your divine plan.

Along the way, I’ve undergone a transformation that has refined my faith, revealed my strength, and deepened my trust in You. I honor the journey that has shaped me into the woman I am today, following the path of your divine plan

Father, have I become the virtuous woman You are shaping me to be?

Am I deemed worthy in Your eyes?

I desire to walk fully in the purpose You have set before me, clothed in strength and dignity, always striving to reflect Your glory. Guide me, Lord, and continue to mold me into the woman You have called me to be.

Believe it. Pause to.

I think about him, as a partner.

Nurturing.

My nurturing husband is the embodiment of steadfast love and quiet strength. His presence feels like home… a place of warmth, safety, and unwavering support.

He listens with his heart as much as his ears, leaning into every word with the kind of attentiveness that makes his partner feel valued and seen.

His hands, firm yet tender, offer a steadying touch during moments of doubt and a soft caress that conveys affection without words.

He notices the little things, like the way my face lights up at the sound of bird singing or the need for quiet and isolation for no reason at all. His actions are thoughtful and deliberate, from making sure I have my favorite snacks to stepping in to share the load without being asked. He takes pride in creating a life together, working not just for shared goals but also for the joy of their connection. He is both my protector and encourager, standing strong in moments of challenge and cheering the loudest in times of success. His love is consistent and patient, not just in grand gestures but in the daily acts of care that whisper, “I’m here, and I’ll always be here.”

Aligned in divine time.

Believe it. Pause to. Delusion. 48 & Single.

I bring it back, counteract. He helps the tempted.

I trust God’s voice.

Believe it. Pause to. See it.

As the wife of a nurturing husband, I bring strength, grace, and compassion to our partnership. I value his care and commitment, offering him a safe space to be vulnerable while encouraging his purpose and potential. I am confident in who I am, standing beside him as his equal while trusting his leadership.

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.

I’m not ashamed of who I am.

I don’t want the American Dream I want a gotdamn fairytale!!!!!!!!!!

In fairytales, characters often gain love, freedom, justice, transformation, happiness, or the fulfillment of their dreams, which is often reflected in material wealth such as grand castles, royal titles, abundant treasures, fine clothing, and a life of luxury as a reward for enduring and overcoming their struggles.

How did I become his wife?

What does that mean?

He asked I said Yes or do you mean the courtship?

Once Upon a Time

A man shall find his wife as he walks in his purpose and follows God’s guidance. Finding a wife means recognizing her when God places her in his life.

The “finding” is orchestrated by God.

It’s not about frantically searching but being spiritually prepared to recognize and honor her when she appears.

Genesis 24

Isaac didn’t go looking for Rebekah.

Proverbs 18:22

Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord.

Discernment & Intentionality

Both the man and the woman seek God’s guidance to know if the relationship is aligned with His will.

A man who finds a wife isn’t just dating for fun; he’s seeking a partner who aligns with his faith, values, and purpose.

I’m no longer pressed to be a wife.

I can’t even get “this” life right.

The Most High God

I submit a request please clean up my mess forgive me of my sins allow me to begin again